About

When I was in the process of becoming a licensed foster parent, I had a hard time finding practical information on what to expect and how to best prepare for this new adventure. Much of what I found made foster parents sound either like monsters or like angels. Most of what comes out in the news about foster care focuses on the brokenness of the system: kids who fall through the cracks, foster parents who are abusive, etc. But what about the day-to-day ins & outs of the life of a foster family?

Once we started our first placement, we began our crash course in all things “foster care.” After six months with our children, I felt compelled to begin sharing from my limited experience, in hopes that I could offer others like myself some practical insight in order to help them feel more equipped/informed. So I started making videos.

We have been licensed since 2013. We now have three children who share our last name and we have fostered a growing number of additional children, each of whom have been part of our family for a season. I no longer refer to us as “foster parents,” but rather as “a foster family.” Our children are very much involved and part of our role in the lives of those who come and go. We are all in this together.

I am not an expert. But I am passionate about foster care and I am passionate about cultivating a family life in which everyone flourishes. It takes a lot of intention, but we are seeing some beautiful fruit.

This web site is a space for me to share some of what I’ve found helpful. I hope it serves you in some way!

~ Christy

6 thoughts on “About

  1. Harry Niemeijer says:

    Dear Christy,

    Many thanks for your elaborate collection of vlogs regarding foster care. In just a couple of weeks I have been watching them all, since my wife and I have started to care about foster care. We have been married for almost five years now. Although becoming parents have always been the dream for our married life, it has not yet come through for us, despite all the effort that went into reaching this goal. So, we decided to take notice of the possibilities and ramifications of becoming foster patents. My wife is the bread winner and works a demanding full time job as a customer relations manager at IKEA, I have come to devote my time and energy to making home and volunteer within both our families, our church and the neighbourhood.

    In light of your vlog serie during Foster Care Awareness Month I would like to ask if you could do a video (or videos) (or send me your perspective) on the following topics:

    1. Spousal commitment
    I know you already have made a video on this topic. You have stated the importance of both partners being equally committed to taking up the role of foster parent. How should I interpret this in light of our situation where my primary role is to make home and my wife is working fulltime with an irregular working schedule? What is the level of flexibility we should strive for?

    2. What age(s) to start with?
    I have mentioned that we, as a couple, are almost inexperienced when it comes to parenting. Set aside the incidental babysitting, our rep on this is quite nonexistent. Should this impact our decision about which age(s) to opt for? My gut feeling tells me we should start with a short term placement of (a) kid(s) 0-4 years. Am I right?

    3. How to tell, what to say?
    What is your perspective on telling your family, friends and neighbours about becoming foster parents, and about an upcoming placement in your family? How could/should/would you ease the introduction of one or more foster kids within the many social networks you are part of? What to tell and what not to tell? Could you give me insight in the responses you have encountered by introducing new foster kids?

    I very much like to hear from you and hope you keep making more videos on this topic!

    Kind regards,

    Harry Niemeijer
    Steenwijk, The Netherlands

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    • Christy K. says:

      Hi Harry,

      Thank you so much for taking the time to write. I will do my best to respond with videos addressing each of these excellent questions very soon!

      Best,
      Christy

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  2. Lena says:

    I have wanted to be a foster parent but wondered where to go. Do you recommend a agency or DSHS?

    I live in WA and I don’t see much about foster care agencies or where to start.

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  3. fostercaretalk says:

    Hi Christy,
    I have been a carer for some 30 years. I relate very closely to your feelings expressed in your Vlogs (especially the 3 things you don’t like about foster care) My list would be slightly longer, but nevertheless very similar. It is a global issue and I like you want to help make it a more safe path for these kids and their families. I agree with you about the ‘need to know’ in order to do your job well. I propose that the relationship between carer and parent needs to be bolstered. By providing training into how to build these relationships as key, not as just an afterthought. Hey, I wondered could use links to your vlogs on my blog as a way of promoting a Global conversation. I am not anti-foster care. I am not anti-birthparent, I am pro-family. I want to drive change within the community where we come together to support the family in getting back on track. I am in the process of being accredited (licensed) to be a professional therapeutic Career. This is essentially a foster carer who is being paid to work with one child at a time and provide outcomes. The difference is that they need to be qualified i.e. Diploma or Batchelor degree. The anomaly is that I have the lived experience to raise traumatized children, yet those with such qualification have no understanding of what to do until they do it. Nevertheless, I am beginning from a place where I will offer this observation down the track. I hope that we can keep in touch and maybe collaborate on different issues over time. Kind Regards Robyn

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    • Christy K. says:

      Hi Robyn! Thank you for writing. You are welcome to use my videos on your site. Good luck with your training. I’m sure you will be a blessing to many!

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